Now, this is what I'm talking about. You can be a cop 'round here without even having to pay for it. The next county over (we live right on the border of Linn and Marion counties; in fact, Mill City is half in one and half in the other) is asking for volunteer cops. I should sign up for that shit and be a cop. In fact, I'd almost be willing to pay them to let me be a cop. I just want all the Cop Stuff, and the ability to take bribes for minor traffic violations. And, uh, yeah, I'll secure the fuck out of a crime scene or two.
Seriously, though...
